THE LUCKY CAT

So on Monday after my surgery, this little guy showed up on my window sill at work.  I've worked with Miss Pope for many, many years and I've never had the pleasure of having this good luck charm grace my office.  For those of you who need a lesson on what this little guy is and means, please read what I've pasted below, courtesy of Wikipedia.  The parts I liked are that mine has its right paw raised, which means to bring good luck and wealth, and that it is holding a coin, and figurines that hold the coin can be used as a "piggy bank" which is funny considering the title of my blog.
Now, this little guy is just "on loan" for now, but I'm thinking he will bring me some good fortune in the baby-making arena.  Read on for some fun facts!

A maneki-neko figurine

The Maneki-neko (招き猫^?, literally "Beckoning Cat"; also known as Welcoming Cat, Lucky Cat, Money Cat, or Fortune Cat) is a common Japanese figurine (lucky charm, talisman), usually made of ceramic, which is believed to bring good luck to the owner. The figurine depicts a cat (traditionally a calico Japanese Bobtail) beckoning with an upright paw, and is usually displayed—many times at the entrance—in shops, restaurants, pachinko parlors, and other businesses. Some of the sculptures are electric or battery-powered and have a slow-moving paw beckoning.

Maneki-neko come in different colors, styles, and degrees of ornateness. In addition to ceramic figurines, maneki-neko can be found as keychains, piggy banks, air fresheners, and miscellaneous ornaments.

Due to its popular presence within Chinese communities it is frequently mistaken for being Chinese in origin rather than Japanese and is mistakenly referred to as a Chinese Lucky Cat or jīnmāo (Golden Cat).

The gesture

To Westerners it may seem as if the maneki-neko is waving rather than beckoning. This is due to the difference in gestures and body language recognized by Westerners and the Japanese. The Japanese beckoning gesture is made by holding up the hand, palm out, and repeatedly folding the fingers down and back up, thus the cat's appearance. Some maneki-neko made specifically for Western markets will have the cat's paw facing backwards, in a beckoning gesture more familiar to Westerners.

Sometimes both paws are raised, though this is less common

Maneki-neko can be found with either the right or left paw raised (and sometimes both). The significance of the right and left raised paw differs with time and place. The most common belief is that the left paw raised brings in customers, while a right paw brings good luck and wealth, although some believe the opposite. Another interpretation says that a raised left paw attracts money, while a raised right paw protects it. Still others say that a left paw raised is best for drinking establishments, the right paw for other stores. (Those who hold their liquor well are called hidari-kiki in Japan, "left-handed"). ^[2]

It is commonly believed the higher the raised paw, the greater the luck. Consequently, over the years maneki-neko's paw has tended to appear ever higher. Some use the paw height as a crude method of gauging the relative age of a figure. Another common belief is that the higher the paw, the greater the distance good fortune will come from.

Some maneki-neko feature battery- or solar-powered moving arms endlessly engaged in the beckoning gesture.

Collar, bib and bell

Maneki-neko usually have some sort of decoration around their neck. This can be a neckerchief or a scarf but the most common attire is a collar, bell and decorative bib. These items are most likely in imitation of what was common attire for cats in wealthy households during the Edo period. Red collars made from a red flower, the hichirimen, were popular and small bells were attached for decoration and to keep track of the cat's whereabouts.

The bib might also be related to the bibs often decorating statues of the divinity Jizō Bosatsu. Protective statues of Jizō can be found guarding the entrances to Japanese shrines and graveyards. Jizō is the protector of sick and dying children and grateful parents of children recovered from illness will place a bib around Jizō as a gift of thankfulness

The coin

A maneki-neko in Tokyo, Japan beckons customers to buy lottery tickets

Maneki-neko are sometimes depicted holding a coin; usually a gold coin called a koban (小判^?), used during the Edo period in Japan. A koban was worth one ryō, another early Japanese monetary unit, though the koban most maneki-neko hold is indicated to be worth ten million ryō (千万両), an extraordinary sum of money. A ryō can be imagined as worth a thousand dollars, although the value of the coin, like the value of the dollar, varied considerably. In Japanese, the idiom "koban to cats" (猫に小判, neko ni koban^?) is the traditional equivalent of pearls before swine.

The coin ties into the cat's part in bringing good fortune and wealth. It is not surprising then that one can often find maneki-neko used as banks, a practice which goes back at least to the 1890s, much like the Western piggy bank.

Sometimes, pennies and other small coin denominations are left on the maneki-neko as offerings. This is a practice somewhat related to that of leaving coins in a fountain or wishing well.

Composition

Maneki-neko are typically made of ceramic. However, cheaper maneki-neko can be made of other materials ranging from plastic to wood to papier-mâché to clay, while expensive maneki-neko may be made of jade or gold. The moving maneki-neko are usually made of plastic.

Origins

History

While it is believed that maneki-neko first appeared during the later part of the Edo period (1603–1867) in Japan the earliest documentary evidence comes from the 1870s, during Japan's Meiji Era. It is mentioned in a newspaper article in 1876 and there is evidence kimono-clad Maneki-neko were distributed at a shrine in Osaka during this time. An ad from 1902 advertising maneki-neko indicates that by the turn of the century they were popular.^[3]

Beyond that, the exact origins of maneki-neko are uncertain, but there is a folk tale involving a wooden cat shaped this way:

A young woman had a cat, which she valued above all else. One day, she had her friend, a swordsman over. The cat suddenly went frantic, clawing at the woman's kimono. Thinking the cat was attacking her, the swordsman severed the head of the cat, which flew through the air, then lodged its teeth into a highly poisonous snake on the support boards above. After the incident, the woman would neither eat nor sleep. The swordsman felt guilty for what he had done and sad for the woman. He went to a woodcarver, who was called "the best in the land", who made him a carving of the cat, a paw raised in greeting. When he gave the carving to her, she was overjoyed and lived her life again instead of suffering.

A frequent attribution to several Japanese emperors, as well as to Oda Nobunaga and samurai Ii Naotaka, is that one day the luminary passed by a cat, which seemed to wave to him. Taking the cat's motion as a sign, the unknown nobleman paused and went to it. Diverted from his journey, he realized that he had avoided a trap that had been laid for him just ahead. Since that time, cats have been considered wise and lucky spirits. Many Japanese shrines and homes include the figurine of a cat with one paw upraised as if waving—hence the origin of maneki-neko, often referred to as kami-neko in reference to the cat's kami or spirit.

Others have noted the similarities between the maneki-neko's gesture and that of a cat washing its face. There is a Japanese belief that a cat washing its face means a visitor will soon arrive. This belief may in turn be related to an even older Chinese proverb that states that if a cat washes its face, it will rain. Thus it is possible a belief arose that a figure of a cat washing its face would bring in customers.

In modern cultures, maneki-neko can be frequently found in rooms on the third floors of buildings, due to the auspicious qualities associated with the number three. Japanese folklore suggests that keeping a talisman of good fortune, such as the maneki-neko, in bedrooms and places of study will bring about favorable results and life successes.

Legends and stories

Maneki-neko is the subject of a number of legends. Here are three of the most popular, explaining the cat's origins:

The Temple Cat: This story goes that a wealthy feudal lord was taking shelter under a tree near Gōtoku-ji temple (in Western Tokyo) during a thunderstorm. The lord saw the temple priest's cat beckoning to him and followed; a moment later the tree was struck by lightning. The wealthy man became friends with the poor priest and the temple became prosperous. When the cat died, supposedly the first maneki-neko was made in his honor.

The Courtesan: A geisha named Usugumo, living in Yoshiwara, in eastern Tokyo, kept a cat, much beloved by her. One night, the cat began tugging at her kimono. No matter what she did, the cat persisted. The owner of the brothel saw this, and believing the cat bewitched, cut its head off. The cat's head then flew to the ceiling where it killed a snake, ready at any moment to strike. Usugumo was devastated by the death of her companion. To cheer her up, one of her customers made her a wooden likeness of her cat as a gift. This cat image then became popular as the maneki-neko.

The Old Woman: An old woman living in Imado (eastern Tokyo) was forced to sell her cat due to extreme poverty. Soon afterwards the cat appeared to her in a dream. The cat told her to make its image in clay. She did as instructed, and soon afterward sold the statue. She then made more, and people bought them as well. They were so popular she soon became prosperous and wealthy.

Surgery success!

Good morning!  To those of you who weren't in contact with me via text last night I thought I should fire off an early morning blog since I'm sure you're all DYING to know how things went and your lives have been put completely on hold waiting for an update from me.  :)
I'll give you the rundown of how the WHOLE day went.
First of all, I got ready as they instructed...no make up, etc.  I took a picture and sent it to my girlfriends.  I captioned it "All ready for surgery...or perhaps, more appropriately, my Proactiv Commercial debut!"  Stupid zits.  Thank God they invented make-up. 
Mom picked me up at 10:30am. I showed her my pet-feeding instructions, but my dad volunteered to stop over and feed and let the dogs out before I would even get home to reduce their excitedness and so my poor mom wouldn't have to deal with them.  Great idea!  So I showed mom the cat feeding instructions which are even more complicated than the dogs (they get canned food, and dry food, sprinkled with joint medication, and drizzled with water)...but she loves cats as much as I do so it was no problem for her.
We then headed out and stopped at an ATM for me on the way...not that I was planning on doing a hospital shopping spree or anything, but I wanted to get my "banking" done in case I felt crappy today.  I talked my mom through what buttons to push since she doesn't use an ATM herself.  Ah, technology.  She did great.
We then got to the hospital right on time and registered.  Then a guy named Jim, a volunteer, was instructed to walk me and my mom back to the SPA.  (I was like, what?  I know I have to do a urine pregnancy test, but a massage too?  This is just too much!  What a great hospital!  Bring on the white bathrobes and cucumber eye covers - here I come!)  After walking dizzily through the maze of hospital hallways we arrived safely at our destination - the SPA - the "Surgery and Procedure Area."  Nice.
Mom and I sat in the waiting room for exactly 1.5 seconds before a nurse was out there beckoning me back.  They took mom to my "room" and me to the scale.  Damn those scales.  They are everywhere!  I weighed in and they took my temperature with a wand type object that scans across your forehead and around the back to behind your ear.  They've come a long way from rectal thermometers!  I didn't have a fever despite my worry that earlier in the week when blind Cecil chomped a tennis ball out of my hand and put a puncture wound in my thumbnail bed that I was sure would cause an infection from animal saliva germs, cause a fever, and I'd be rejected for surgery.  Those fears were put to rest.  Off to the room I go where they are getting my mother comfortable.  They treated her as a patient as much as they did me!  Get her all set up with a chair, her book, a table.  How to use the TV remote.  How to use the screen that shows my surgical progress.  (This is very cool technology that shows different colors for the stage of the process I was in.  White initially, then aqua when I was prepped and ready for surgery, navy blue for in surgery, and orange for in recovery).  So now that mom was all settled in, back to me.  They took me in the bathroom so I could give my urine pregnancy test sample and slip into something a little less comfortable, a green checkered hospital gown, open to the back.  Stylish.  I received a cup to put my pee in and a bag to put my clothes in.  I was instructed how to lock the door since the bathroom was for 2 adjoining rooms...don't need any surprise guests walking in when trying to catch your own urine in a cup - that is never an easy, or flattering, task!  Once I was ready the nurse came in and tied me up in the back, although I'm not sure what for since I had to hop back onto my bed but "make sure not to sit on your gown at all."
Then came the warm blanket.  Ahhhh.  :)  Enough said on that one.
Another nurse then came in, and each one that comes in signs in on your little room board.  She got me started with my IV.  A little stinging numbing meds, and then they popped that sucker into my vein on my left hand.  It matched nicely with the hospital band on my right wrist.  Between that, and the gown, I would've been all the rage at the hospital fashion show for sure.  Not to mention my "parade of homes" booties I got to wear on my feet.  I was a little nervous they'd have trouble with my IV considering my "Salt Diet" the evening before, and my 2:30am struggles with dehydration, and nothing to remedy it with.  But everything went just fine.  I was given like a saline solution or something, and also was ready to be hooked up to a bag of antibiotics for surgery.
Mom and I then got to talk while we waited for more visitors.  I am SO glad my mom was with me.  Having Rob there would've been wonderful too, but he is SO busy at work (which is a GREAT thing) and he doesn't really care for hospitals and procedures...most men don't I don't think.  My mom has seen a thing or two herself in the hospital for her own care, and my sister's.  I'm sure it isn't easy to see another one of her kids all hooked up, but mine was for a much more positive reason so she powered through it.  It was absolutely lovely to have some good conversation with her.  She is THE BEST mom. 
Our first visit was from the Chaplain.  And that's fine.  I know St. E's is a Catholic hospital and I still consider myself a Catholic.  I was raised Catholic and went to Catholic school.  I went through periods in life, when I was younger, where Religion was stupid, or not cool, etc. but I never didn't believe.  Rob and I don't get to church as often as we'd like and that is something I do hope to change some day.  We have been introduced to Appleton Alliance Church and I really LOVE going there.  Every time I do I actually get something out of being there.  Catholic mass has lost that a little bit for me, but that is still my roots and those roots run deep after 8 years at St. Al's, and a Catholic wedding, etc.  However, having a stranger show up in your room, not knowing what you're in there for, desperately trying to determine what you're in there for by scanning your chart, saying some odd comments like "oh, you won't even be here overnight for this" when I had initially told him I was in for just a minor outpatient procedure...doesn't really make you want to join hands and pray with him.  I politely declined his spiritual services.  After he had left I hoped I had made the right decision, but I knew I had lots of friends and family praying for me yesterday.
Our second visit was much worse than the Chaplain.  It was with the anesthesiologist doctor.  He explained to me that an anesthesiologist nurse would actually be the one administering my meds, but he was there to have a little chat with me about what to expect.  He asked if I'd ever had any problems with anesthesia in the past.  I said no.  However, the only time I was ever completely knocked out was for my wisdom teeth.  That was nearly 20 years ago.  (Wow, again, feeling old here).  For my two D&C surgeries I'm pretty sure I was still conscious, just really, REALLY, out of it.  He asked if I was allergic to anything.  Later my mom and I laughed, "well, I haven't tried EVERYTHING.  I have no known allergies...but that's not to say I won't be allergic to whatever you have in that drug bag of yours!"  His last comment to me was, "There are some risks I have to discuss with you, and although they are small, they are still risks.  I don't mean to scare you but there is a possibility of heart attack, brain damage, and death.  Any questions?"  Seriously, that is how it went down.  A doctor, sitting 2 feet in front of me, gave me my risk options of heart attack, brain damage, or death.  I told him I didn't have any questions, but my mom sure did! :)  She tried to smooth it over to reduce any worry she or I would have from his very direct conversation.  After he left, we discussed the possibilities.  I said I would prefer that he and his nurse don't let any of the above happen, thank you.  I did say that death would be better than brain damage...and that if I did die, that my animals MUST be taken care of by Rob, mom and dad.  No getting shipped off to a "farm" or the shelter, or euthanized, or given to a friend.  Not happening.  They would already be in too much shock from no longer having their mommy.  :(  So, while we let it sink in that a simple little procedure may have just turned into my death sentence, there was another knock at the door.
It was my dad!  BEST VISITOR SO FAR!  He was there to meet my mom for lunch in the hospital cafeteria, but things were running late for me.  I was supposed to be in surgery at noon but Dr. Wagener had a case before mine that lasted longer.  So dad talked to the guy at the front desk and he happened to figure out that he lived "just across the ravine" from mom and dad, so the guy said "well, let's walk you back there.  We'll find your family."  Kind of cool that they would do that.  You sometimes think hospitals are very restrictive on things like that.  Dad came in and made himself at home.  We chatted and had a good laugh about the shocking anesthesia conversation.  I of course know there is a risk anytime you go under.  I have to sign the consent forms every time my vet, Dr. Biese, puts Cecil under for a procedure.  However, it was just alarming to have it said so bluntly to your face. 
The next visit was from Dr. Wagener.  Yay!  Mom and dad both got to meet him and I did ask just a few questions about medications and the "slurry" they would be using.  He said "OK - see you soon!"
Next another nurse came in.  This was at about 12:45pm.  She was there to roll me up to the OR.  Mom and dad said good bye and headed off to a gourmet lunch in the cafeteria.  And I headed out for my ride upstairs.  I haven't been wheeled around like that in quite awhile.  (I was rolled out on a wheel chair when I had my first D&C).  We wheeled past the nurses station and I didn't know if I should wave at them as if I were in a parade, or just mind my own business.  The shy girl inside me took over and I pretended I didn't see them.  I chatted with my chariot pusher on the elevator and we discussed why I was doing this surgery.  She wished me the best.  I was wheeled into the OR which was a bustling environment.
It was a big, cold, white, sterile OR.  In the center was the little operating table with the three HUGE lamps positioned overhead.  There was one nurse in there getting set up, and Kevin, my anesthesiologist nurse who would give me my meds.  Kevin was VERY friendly and talkative and made me feel at ease right away.  I had to scoot my bare butt from my wheeled chariot bed to the narrow operating room table.  I laid back.  They hooked up my leg massagers which help prevent blood clots.  Those felt sort of cool actually. I was informed that I'd have a tube down my throat too, but I would never feel that.  Very soon afterward, Dr. Wagener stopped in.  We made some small talk about Rob being at work.  Kevin chimed in and asked me questions about Rob's Import Repair.  It was fun to talk like I had just met these people at a social gathering when in fact I was putting them in charge of my life and body for the next 50 minutes.  Next came the oxygen mask which makes it difficult to continue to carry on a conversation through, but I managed.  I saw Kevin with a vial of milky white substance which I had to laugh at because Jessie at work had asked me if she thought I would be on Propofol, the milky substance that killed Michael Jackson (because it was administered improperly).  When I saw that vial, I felt like the King of Pop, or like the Queen of Hysteroscopy, maybe.  Kevin informed me that he was about to give me the good stuff, which "would make him look more handsome....but it would not make Dr. Wagener look more handsome."  It was funny.  Everyone in the room laughed.  The last thing I remember was Kevin asking if I had children.  People in the room answered for me "no, that is why she's here today!  Hoping to change that."  Kevin mentioned something about his 19 and 20 year old kids who were not quite independent yet and I'm pretty sure he offered them to me (another one of Kevin's funnies) and that was it.  It's odd because when I had my wisdom teeth done I can distinctly remember fading into unconsciousness.  I remember the ceiling started "moving" in a psychedelic fashion and then I was out.  With this, it was like a switch was just turned off.
Then...the switch was turned back on.  I came-to in the recovery area.  I could see the clock.  It was 1:45pm.  I had the weird oxygen tube things sticking out of my nostrils kind of making me feel like I belonged on an episode of HOUSE, and I was SO tired, but felt odd sleeping since I could see the hustle and bustle of nurses around me.  There were women on either side of me, separated by curtains, each doing their best to recover from their surgeries.  The woman on the right sounded elderly and was in great need of ice chips.  The woman on my left was having a terrible bout with nausea.  I listened as they tried to determine what else they could do for her, sounded like they'd already given her a bunch of stuff.  I listened while she let out each agonizing belch.  For a moment it felt like I was next to the fat, really drunk guy in a bar.  Belch, belch, belch.  Poor woman.  For me, they offered me ice chips, which were DELICIOUS!  She asked how my pain was.  I was having consistent painful cramping so I said "about a 6?"  It's always so hard to guess on that pain chart with the happy faces, and the sad faces where exactly you fall.  She said OK and hooked another thing up through my IV...(I had a lot of stuff pumped into that vein yeseterday!) and in mere moments those cramps subsided to a much more manageable period-like cramp.  AMAZING.
At about 2:10pm I was wheeled downstairs by yet another nurse.  My mom was waiting for me.  She had some news from Dr. Wagener!  THERE WAS NO ADHESION!!!!  I just had some thickened endometrial (uterine) lining which he scraped down a bit, and he removed the polyp.  SO - no estrogen or antibiotics for me!  He just said I'd have to repeat the Sonohysterogram in a couple weeks and if it all looked good, which I'm sure it will, we can move forward.  No worry about that darn adhesion coming back, no worries about having to go through this all again with a balloon catheter.  All good news! 
I was sleepy but coherent.  Another nurse came in and plugged in my leg massagers.  She asked how my pain was.  I said it was MUCH better, but still had some cramping.  She asked if ibuprofen would help, and I said sure.  She got me that with some pudding and a granola bar so I wouldn't have to take it on an empty stomach.  I also had some apple juice which tasted great since I had been thirsty for over 12 hours.  The nurse told me my blood pressure was high, which could be normal after surgery.  So my mom and I were left alone for what seemed like a long time.  I just wanted that BP to come down so I could get out of there.  The more I started to "come to" the more I wanted to put my clothes on and get home to my own couch. 
The next time she came in I said I was ready to go home.  She got another nurse to help me get dressed.  I was given a pad and some sexy cotton hospital undies.  I had to be able to urinate before I could go home, but that was no problem after having all those bags of meds I had pumped in me.  I was able to pee alone and put my pad and undies and pants and shoes on.  Then the nurse had to help me with my bra and shirt since she had to feed my IV bag and cord through the arm holes.  They didn't want to disconnect me because once I had stood up I was feeling a tad bit nauseous.  I was able to go sit back down, all dressed in my clothes, and they did finally disconnect me.  They went over my discharge papers and my mom signed off so we could leave.  I was given a nice barf bag to get me home.  I was put on a wheel chair and wheeled outside where it was nice and warm.  My mom got the car, I hopped in and said my goodbyes.  EVERYONE at the hospital was SO nice and friendly and patient and calm.  Even the scary anesthesiologist guy....that's just his job and he has to tell everyone those risks.  Although, I can say, when I woke up in recovery, I was like "YES!  I woke up!!!!"  :)
The drive home I was a little nauseous.  Was nice to finally put my butt on my couch.  Mom fed the cats and then let the dogs out.  (Again, in case you were wondering, "who let the dogs out?"  My mom).  Mom and I talked and she got me some 7-up to sip on.  I made her watch the Glee Project with me.  :)
She went home at about 5pm since Rob would be home shortly after 5:30.  My mom was FANTASTIC yesterday.  She was the best nurse.  Having to spend a whole day just waiting around and then caring for whatever I needed/wanted can't be the easiest thing, but she did it with ease and I am so blessed to have her!
I was able to text my friends and had some of the greatest responses and messages on facebook.  I know I have great friends but things like this really remind you of what good people there are in the world and how much they really do care about you.  I hope I am as good of friend to them as they are to me, but I think I must be to get such nice messages like that.  :)  I had a nice message from Deb at work, and Heather from grade school, and from Gina my college roommate, and Alana my friend from MN who we met in CA.  I had a message from Heidi at work saying she was so worried about me she emailed Rob for an update, a message from Jacci, my boss, saying she's happy it went so well, a message from my sister, who I then talked to for about 20 minutes after mom left to give her the low-down on it all, a message from my sister-in-laws Ann and Becky, a nice card in the mail from my Aunt, and finally last night a super fun and funny text conversation with Jessie from work.  I was feeling pretty good last night, but those messages really made me feel great.  Thanks everyone!
Rob came home and brought me pizza hut, per my request.  I really wanted cheese bread sticks.  They messed up our order and gave us plain, so I called and they brought us the cheese ones.  Hey, when you have a hankerin' for something, you haven't eaten anything but pudding since 8pm the day before, and you're feeling like you want a treat after surviving surgery, you bet they're going to get your order right!  :)  And it was worth it, the cheese sticks were phenomenal.
Rob and I watched some TV and then it was off to bed at 9:30pm for me.  I slept pretty well.  I was worried about a cat spring-boarding off my stomach as they've been known to do, so I tried to sleep on my side or lay with a pillow on my tummy.  However, knowing that the "slurry" mixture isn't in there and I don't have to worry so much about not having an adhesion reform, I'm much more relaxed with my recovery. 
It says I shouldn't shower for 24 hours, but I think that is anesthesia related.  Probably don't want me to pass out in the shower.  I will wait a bit but will shower this morning because I do plan to go to Amy's shower.  All that could be involved with that is sitting and eating...I think I can handle those 2 activities!  Will be nice to get out of the house and not sit in a hospital all day!  Although, as I've typed this I do have some slight nausea yet, so we'll see.
So my recheck is on 8/14 (about 3 weeks).  Not sure when I will have the next sonohysterogram, but for sure not until at least 2 weeks.  Don't know which will come first, but hoping for an 8/15/12 program start...so fingers crossed. Since we got good news with surgery I think our IVF will go very well.
Thanks for tuning in everyone!

Note to self...

1.  When you say you're going to have a "light meal" the night before surgery, stick to that plan.  Don't let a fun night with your husband at a restaurant you've never been to before turn into:

• ROOT BEER
• SPINACH ARTICHOKE DIP WITH TORTILLA CHIPS
• TURKEY, AVACADO, BACON CLUB WITH MAYO ON THE SIDE
• SWEET POTATO FRIES
• SMALL DQ BROWNIE/CHEESECAKE BLIZZARD

- Yes, you're allowed to feel sorry for yourself because you're having surgery, but you don't need to eat like you will never eat again!  I woke up at 2am with my tongue pasted to the roof of my mouth - SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO thirsty.  There may be nothing worse than being that thirsty and literally being forbidden to drink a glass of water.  UGH!!!!!!!!!!!

2.  Don't pop the big zit on your forhead the night before the day that you have to go out in public naked (with no make-up on is what I mean by naked, since that is how I will feel).

3.  Don't get out of bed at 7am on a day you can sleep in!

4.  Don't plan a nice walk in the morning when the forecast calls for thunderstorms that your dog will fiercely bark at which will cause you to get out of bed at 7am on a day you can sleep in.

5.  Don't get out of bed at 7am on a day you can sleep in when you can't eat or drink anything.  No matter how full you might think I'd be from the extravaganza listed above, when you know you can't eat until about 2pm, your stomach will find a way to grumble at you.  PS - We split the artichoke dip, Rob finished the last several bites of my sandwich, and the last 1/2 of my blizzard.  I mean, you all know I like to eat, but give me some credit!

That should just about cover my morning.  Still up - shave my legs and shower, get my "nest" ready on the couch for when I get home, and make sure all of mom's pet instructions are laid out on the counter nice and clearly.  I'm a little nervous, but not so much.  But, for right now, I'm going to go squeeze that walk in!

T'was the night before surgery...

The day of my surgery is almost here!  This afternoon I'm getting some cleaning done and I ran some errands.  I have yet to remove my fingernail polish.  I will have Rob treat me to a delicious pre-surgery, light, "last meal." (Since I can't eat or drink anything after midnight).
I thought, and still do think, that this is a minor, outpatient, procedure...but I've done a lot this week to prepare!  Had my pre-op on Monday.  Then got a call from pre-registration.  Then today got a call from another department at the hospital who went over my health history and what to expect.  That was pretty extensive and had me feeling like "oh yeah, this is actually a surgery, not just a little office procedure."  I know I will recover quickly but I intend to relax and let my body heal to the best of it's ability so we can move on to IVF, Stat!  (Just had to use a little surgery term there.)
Here's what one website says I can expect afterwards:

What happens after the procedure?

You may stay at your provider's office or the hospital about 1 or 2 hours.
After the procedure you may:

1. feel sleepy or groggy from the anesthetic
2. have some cramps
3. have trouble urinating the first few hours after the procedure
4. have a watery or bloody discharge for 3 or 4 weeks

Your provider may also recommend antibiotics to prevent infection or estrogen (hormone) therapy (which we know I will be put on), which can help the uterus to heal normally.
Ask your provider how to care for yourself after the procedure and when you should come back for a checkup.

I think I can handle all of that.  Good thing I got some free Kotex pads from Jessie's friend Kova who works for KC - I'll be putting those to good use!  LOL!

Tomorrow morning I think I'll go for a walk (outside now, the summer sun's calling my name, I hear it now, I just can't stay inside all day, I gotta get out get me some of those ra-a-ays...SORRY), then shower using ONLY antibacterial soap.  Then, not put ANYHING on my skin.  Dress in some loose jogging pants and a t-shirt, and wait for my mommy to come and give me a ride to the hospital.
The nurse today said the procedure (from the time they wheel me in to the time they wheel me out) will take 50 minutes, and then I will be in the recovery room for about 1 hour.  Then when we get back home here Mom will have to handle my ridiculously rambunctious pets so they don't jump up and knock me in the stomach (I want that "slurry" to stay in place so my adhesion doesn't reform!)  Then it will be "sleepy time" for this girl.
Last night Rob and I went on a little adventure and met with a hypnotist.  It was really cool.  I learned so much from him and about hypnotherapy.  So intriguing.  We talked about the "laws of attraction" - how whatever you think about the most, you get.  I began to think about how I always think "I will never have a baby.  I will never get pregnant.  If I get pregnant, I'll miscarry."  I decided last night to only think "I will get pregnant, I will have a baby..." sort of like The Little Engine That Could...."I think I can I think I can...." 
And, when the nurse asked me today if I had a Power of Attorney, I just thought "not necessary...I think I can, I think I will, survive surgery just fine."  :)
The next time you read my blog I'll be writing with one less polyp and one less adhesion.  Those little jerks don't even know what they have coming right now!  HA HA HA!  (evil laugh)

Pre Op? Check.

....and sit down and type....whew!  After quite the busy day I finally have time to get to this, which is quite important as I have received some prodding from some friends inquiring how my appointment went today.  First of all let's rewind.
Monday was any other Monday.  Could barely drag myself out of bed for work, showered, but did not style my hair (which is not a good look for me, but as far as time management goes, you can't beat it), powered through a day of work and nervously ventured off to my pre-op appointment.  I don't know why but I was very nervous for today.  I arrived early to my appointment and got to sit in the ever-fun OBGYN waiting room where I was able to stare longingly at the bellies of all the pregos awaiting their turn for the ultrasound machine.  There was a young girl there alone with no one to accompany her but her smart phone, there was a girl intently watching Roseanne on the waiting room TV, there was a cute couple with the mommy in a belly-hugging green t-shirt and flip flops that allowed her swollen ankles some breathing room, and there was the guy who nervously responded "she just went to the bathroom" when the nurse called out "MEGAN?" to the waiting room audience.  I entertained myself by playing their stories in my head.  How did they get pregnant?  Did they have an "oops" pregnancy?  Is this their 5th child?  Did any of them struggle and are they pregnant now by means of fertility assistance, as we soon hope to be?  I day-dreamed about the day when Rob and I would be sitting in the waiting room, not as we have in the past while we awaited the sad news that our pregnancy was failing...but I envisioned ME with a belly so big that I couldn't see my feet, waddling in to see our healthy growing baby on the TV monitor and walking out with the 3-D image of the life I'll have growing inside me.  I began to think, WOW - that could be us within the next year, if everything goes well!  But first, surgery.  The nurses voice "JENNINE?!" awakened me from my fantasy and I headed out of baby la-la land and into surgical reality.
I wandered back through the hallway with the nurse leading me through the maze directly to the dreaded scale.  The last time I weighed in there was last year when I was 1/2 marathon training.  I wondered what the nurse thought when she looked at my chart and saw an approximate 40 pound difference from a year ago.  I silently scolded myself, "good grief, Jennine - get control of your diet!"  I plunked down on the crinkly paper exam-table cloth and the nurse and I talked about the hot weather.  We then discussed surgery and she told me how she once woke up during a procedure she was having done (where a scope was down her throat).  She had bruises on her arms from the nurses restraining her while they got her sedated once again and ended her gag reflex session.  Um, yeah.  No thank you.  Please allow me to stay knocked out cold on Friday.  I went through the usual procedural temperature check, pulse, and BP check, and then awaited Dr. Wagener's arrival.  It was nice to sit in that exam room and wait for him with my clothes on for a change.
Dr. Wagener came in and was his usual pleasant self.  He is so calm and easy to talk to.  He let me ask my questions, and then gave me some instruction.  In a nutshell, the night before surgery I have to take a pill that will help my cervix dilate.  He said "since you've never had a vaginal delivery..." (and I KNOW he wasn't "rubbing it in" but something inside me felt inadequate when he said those words)..."you'll take the pill to help your cervix get soft to help with the surgery.  You may experience some mild cramping."  Should be interesting to see what that really feels like.  A dilating cervix has me imagining more than mild cramping.  Hmmm.  So I take that pill, then go to bed.  The day of the surgery I arrive at 11am.  My surgery is at noon.  I told Dr. Wagener my mom was coming with me since Rob has to work.  Dr. Wagener asked for my mom's name, and asked if he could give her all my discharge instructions...to which I responded "Yes!" of course!  I wouldn't trust anybody other than my mother with such important directions!  He explained to me that they will remove the polyp and then if it is indeed an adhesion, they will remove that as well.  Then the trick is to keep it from growing back (because it is scar tissue and a surgery like this could cause more scar tissue to form.  After the surgery, if the parts of my uterus that are healing "stick together" and heal together, it could reform).  There is a 20% chance that it would grow back and if it did, it would grow back quickly, in about 3-5 days.  To prevent it from growing back they put in a "slurry," or a thick fluid that sits in between the uterine walls so that they don't "stick together," and then I will be put on estrogen for a few weeks.  (Honestly not sure what that does, but apparently it helps prevent the adhesions from reforming, which is all I really need to know).  I will also be on antibiotics simply because they want to make sure everything heals up very well so we can move forward with IVF ASAP.  Once I'm all healed, I will have to have another sonohysterogram to make sure nothing grew back (my fingers will be crossed for several weeks, from the time I'm wheeled out of hysteroscopy to the time I walk in for sonohysterogram #2) and if nothing grew back we'll be all clear to move forward.  BUT, if an adhesion did return, I will have to have the surgery again and then I will have to have a balloon catheter put in my uterus to keep it "open" so the adhesions won't reform...but Dr. Wagener said that is pretty uncomfortable for most people so they don't do that as the first option.  So let's all hope and pray that things work out the first time.
I asked Dr. Wagener if he thought I could still program start for IVF on 8/15/12.  He thought that MIGHT be a possibility, but having just described to you what I did above, he said "let's wait to see how things go."  Rob and I will always have the option of driving to MN for a day to do our program start there, rather than waiting for RMIA to come back to Appleton, which if my calculations are correct wouldn't be until October, which, as we all know for impatient me that would not be an option if we can prevent it.
Overall I'm no longer too worried about Friday.  To be honest, I'm looking forward to a day out of the office and a chance to rest and catch up on my mouting DVR schedule.  I REALLY can't wait to get it all behind me, to have a nice healthy cleaned out uterine cavity, to hope for the best, and get the all-clear to move on to IVF!  Yay!  (I asked Dr. Wagener if it all goes well, and nothing grows back, will my chances be improved for IVF...and he just said "well, you need to have a clean uterine cavity so we HAVE to do this..."  So...bring it on).
I picked up my cervix dilating meds tonight (Rob drove me to Walgreens and then cooked me supper - husband of the year!).  The literature that came with the pill bottle explains its use is for stomach ulcers.  I sure hope I got the right prescription!  I'm sure I did, but I feel another Google session coming on!  Sorry Heidi!
After my appointment I came home and cleaned nearly the whole house.  Got a TON done.  I want to get everything spiffed-up since after surgery I can't lift anything (or, therefore, vaccuum) for a couple days, and also no sex for 2 weeks.  Poor husband of the year.

TGIF & UWSP

Hello and Happy Friday everyone!  Today I got the results of my mammogram - no signs of breast cancer.  I wasn't really worried but it's still nice to know, and to get some GOOD news!  This week I got the notes for how to prepare for my surgery next Friday.  First of all, I was SO excited to learn I can't wear any make-up, or my contacts, to the hospital that day.  I will be feeling p-retty darn hot.  I also can't eat or drink anything, not even water, after midnight the night before, and my surgery isn't until noon on Friday.  So not only will I be ugly on Friday, but I will be darn hungry too!  And lastly, I can't take any OTC medications, no advil, no ibuprofen, etc. from now until surgery.  Here's to really hoping I don't develop a killer headache this weekend!  The one good thing is that they crossed out the instructions for how to give myself a home enema before surgery.  Apparently that part is not important, and I'm very grateful for that.
Today I learned that Rodger ate an entire loaf of bread off of the counter after I had gone to work.  Perhaps he is the one in need of an enema!
This weekend shall be a fun one.  Tonight is stay-in date night with my charming hubby, and tomorrow is Randy and Alyson's wedding reception!  Although I hope to still lose 20-30 pounds before tomorrow, and I'm starting to think that won't happen now, I'm still excited for it!  I have a new dress and new shoes, and we're dining at Victoria's beforehand so I really can't wait to spend the time with family and friends and support the happy new married couple!
Sunday we'll probably go up north.  Rodger needs to burn off some calories from his carb-loading.
I'm really looking forward to next week.  Can't wait for my surgery on Friday.  My mom will most likely be caring for me since Rob will have to work.  I plan to relax and watch the start of the Olympics that night.  They say I should be feeling better by Saturday already, which is good because I hope to make it to my friend's bridal shower that day.  It will just be nice to have the surgery behind me and have a good feeling that I know all the "bad pregnancy hindering stuff" in my uterus will be long gone.  After that I hope it's just all downhill from there.
One cute story is that I found a game on my friend's Facebook page where you just click on it and it tells you how many kids you will have and what their gender will be.  Mine came up 2 boys and one girl.  I wonder if that 2 boys thing may mean twin boys this time and then a surprise girl next time.  :)  I can dream.  One should always trust Facebook to determine their future outcomes, right?  The neat thing is that my friend Jaime did the game as well and she got the same answer as me.  She's nearly 2/3 of the way there.  Already has a baby boy and has another little one on the way.  I take that to mean that the quiz IS right.  If she's on her way to having her 2 boys and 1 girl, I must be on my way to having mine as well! :)
Another thing I wanted to discuss was the word Omen.  I keep saying, when "things" in the universe suggest I'll be pregnant soon, (like horoscopes, etc)..."oh, it must be an omen."  I was recently told an omen is a bad thing.  But, I've heard people say "must be a good omen."  So perhaps I'm just leaving an important word out that I need to start adding in...but I should probably open my thesaurus and find a substitute for omen.  Don't want to be jinxing myself here!
Lastly we received sad news this week that a friend from college passed away suddenly this week. At this time I can't recall really what his title was, but he was like our Resident Advisor.  He had an "apartment" in our residence hall, Smith Hall at UW-SP.  He supervised all activities within the hall.  I was a member of what we called "head board" (I was second floor governor) and we would have meetings in his apartment and plan exciting events for the students who resided in Smith.  He was super nice, and now that he's gone we're all recalling a lot of good memories on Facebook.  We've even thought of planning a Smith Hall reunion or get together of some sort.  So, in the sad event of Rob Holland's death this week, he once again has brought people together.  He's opened us all back up to the possibility of reuniting some day.  It's funny to think that at one point in our lives we all LIVED TOGETHER.  The people in that hall were your family.  They were who you said "good morning" to, and who you slept on the other side of the wall from.  They were who saw you in your pajamas outside during a firedrill, and who saw you take your puke garbage out to the dumpster after a hard night of house-parties.  They were the people you waited in line with for the shower when your hair was all a mess and yesterday's mascara was circling your eyes.  They were the people you studied with in the basement, sent emails to in the computer lab, and who's laundry you pulled out of the washer so you could finally use it yourself.  They were your family, and then after graduation they scattered all over the state or the country, and thanks to Facebook you've been able to stalk what their kids look like and where they're currently working.  And you admit that you sometimes wonder if you'd ever see them again.  I hope we can have a reunion and reconnect.  Those Smith Hall people were good people.  We toughed it out in the "ghetto" together.  We had the shortest walk to Tremors and the campus gym, but the longest walk to the food hall, Debot (sp?).  We had a drag queen fashion show and a karaoke/root beer party in our basement.  We had a hall director who I remember loved Hawiian pizza as much as I did...and we had each other.  I hope someday I can raise my 3 children (my 2 boys and 1 girl as you'll recall from above) and send them off to UW-SP.  They'd have a blast!
Happy weekend everyone!

This guy...

should be a father.  :)

Candy-gram, Gorilla-gram, Instagram...Mammogram...wait, what?

I can think of a lot of Gram's I'd like to receive.  Telegram, pajamagram, stripper-gram (well, not really)...but no one ever likes a Mammogram.  I am going in for one on Wednesday this week.  It's just a regular old re-check, but I am a little nervous.  After our crappy sonohysterogram I'm hoping I don't get a Guilliana Rancic surprise on Wednesday.  Oye!
Anyway, it's good to get all these tests behind us.  I found out today that I will have a pre-op appontment with Dr. Wagener on Monday, 7/23/12, surgery at 11am on Friday, 7/27/12, and a post-op visit on 8/14/12.  My nurse thinks that I will still qualify for the HOPE program because we are having all my problems "fixed" and she thinks that I will still be able to do a program start on 8/15/12.  Hooray!
On Friday morning, while on vacation, I took the dogs out to go to the bathroom at 3:30am, in the dark, as most normal dog owners do.  I stepped off of our cottage porch steps and thought "oh dang, I forgot my flip-flops.  Oh well, guess I'm going barefoot."  2 minutes later a little bee said "Yes, you are barefoot, and you just stepped on me."  Insert stinger here.  I limped into the cottage, swear words trailing behind me, and pulled the stinger out with a tweasers.  I went back to bed promptly - afterall, it was 3:30am...and when I woke up my foot was swollen, red, irritated and painful. That day we hit up Walgreens for some Benedryl (or Waldryl to be more appropriate) which in turn put me right into la-la land for an hour nap!  I couldn't help but think, "Seriously?  This is my vacation day off of work?!  I would have less chance of having anything bad happen to me if I were tucked safely away in my office at work."  It reminded me of the time I got food poisoning from Chinese food while on vacation in IL, and I spent my entire vacation day slumped over a hotel toilet.  Sounds like I need to quit taking vacation.  Anyway, in preparation for my surgery I can't take any aspirin or Ibuprophen, etc. for a whole week leading up to surgery.  So listen up, bees - buzz off.
Today I hit up the Dress Barn for a cute new number for Randy and Alyson's wedding.  That's right, I purchased clothing from a Barn.  The dress I got is somewhat matronly...that sounds odd...but I didn't go for the traditional "trendy, hip, sexy" dress.  I got something that was practical, comfortable, stylish and oh yes, hides my gut.  I can tell I'm maturing...motherhood?  Bring it on!
I also bought an ottoman for Rocky to jump on next to our bed so he doesn't have to jump the whole way from the floor to the bed.  I've noticed the past 2 nights he hasn't slept with us.  He has arthritis in his knees and I'm afraid he's struggling more and more.  Which is just a reminder of how we all aren't getting any younger.  Which leads me to think about how I really hope my surgery goes well and we can get a pregnancy started in that nice clean uterus sooner than later. I can compare my uterine cleaning surgery to my mom, nephews, and I trying desparately to light a campfire on a 95+ degree day (in the middle of the afternoon) just to roast a dang S'more that we all were craving intently.  The fire pit had to be cleared out of all the old damp fire debris, and then we added just the right fuel to ignite a fire.  Firepit=Uterus.  You see the connection, I know you do.  Reminds me of a quote I know..."Success doesn't happen by spontaneous combustion, you have to light yourself on fire."  Oh, I intend to.
And that makes me think of s'more "grams" to add to our list...babies have "gram-parents" and they eat "teddy-grams"...let's hope sonohysterograms and mammograms lead to all the right kinds of baby-grams!
Goodnight!

Polyps, Adhesions and Surgery, oh my

Hi y'all,
First of all, thank you Jaime for your comment on my last blog...and to everyone else who's shown their support with our recent bout of bad news.  I also want to give a shout out to my home girl Angela who not only had me laughing my butt off at our reunion last night but who also gave me THE BIGGEST BOX of hand-me-down maternity clothes you will ever see!  Thank you!  It is just another sign that I HAVE TO PUT THOSE DAMN CLOTHES TO GOOD USE SOMEDAY!
So I read in my survival handbook all that I could about polyps and adhesions.  There wasn't much in there about adhesions.  However, Dr. Wagener and the technician weren't even 100% sure that it even was an adhesion...because whatever "it" is didn't seem to stretch from one side of my uterus to the other.  Anyway...what I've learned from my book and from the very scary internet is that a polyp is a benign growth that usually doesn't even interfere with pregnancy.  They tend to just squish out of the way of a growing baby.  However, when I saw the picture on the ultrasound screen of this "thing," it looked pretty big and threatening.  I thought if our little egg tried to attach where that polyp already is existing the poor little guy wouldn't stand a chance!  It's like when my dog Rodger pees on a tree and then Cecil pee's on it...marking territory.  That polyp would be like "Um, this is my territory, I'm here first, so beat it."  So good thing we're getting that thing out of there.  Then I read that an adhesion is scar tissue that was probably caused by my 2 D&C's I've had with my 2 miscarriages.  Darn it!  Some of the scary stuff online makes it sound like adhesions can really be a problem and cause tons of infertility problems.  I read in my book that I'll probably have to have a hysteroscopy where they go in through my cervix while I'm under anesthesia and they will remove both the polyp and the scar tissue.  Then I may have to have my uterus kept "open" with a balloon catheter for a few days and be put on estrogen therapy in order to keep the adhesion from reforming.  Good grief!  Sounds exciting, NOT!
I am just really happy to be able to have the surgery and move forward.  Don't know how long after surgery we can try our first round of IVF.  Also don't know if this hurts our chances for the HOPE program, or if it affects our success rate with IVF in general.  Pretty scary.  I've emailed my nurse for some answers.
The next program start date for IVF where we'd pay our money and have some tests, and sign some forms, etc. would be 8/15 (which seemed like a lucky day because it is my nephew's birthday), but now that we've had this come about I don't know when we can start.  Drat.
Overall though I had a great weekend.  I wasn't expecting the news I got at my sonohysterogram on Thursday, but I handled it like a champ, I thought.  My mom and sister came with me and waited in the waiting room for me and I fought back tears as we walked out of the place.  I was so hoping something like this wouldn't happen, and it did.  Go figure.
The rest of the weekend went very well though.  Had an AWESOME time with my sister and parents and nephews up in Shawano, and had a blast at our 8th grade class reunion on Saturday night!  All my girlfriends who I graduated from St. Al's with 20 years ago all have the cutest kids and the best pregnancy, childbirth, breast-feeding and child rearing stories.  I sat around that circle wondering if that would ever be me talking about our kids...and if by that time anyone would even want to listen since by the time we finally have kids all their kids will be graduating from 8th grade themselves!  LOL!  Ugh - Old.
So, now I wait, again patiently, for 7/27/12 to get here so I can have my surgery.  One step at a time!

FAIL.

I haven't had much time to write because I've been on "vacation" the past couple days at our cottage - family was in town visiting, so it was nice to have some relaxing time off.  While off I did manage to squeeze in my sonohysterogram. 
My results were less than favorable.  Dr. Wagener found a polyp and possibly an adhesion.  I will have to have surgery on 7/27/12, recover, and then proceed with IVF, if everything is still favorable to do so.  :(
Of course I walked out of there feeling OK about it all....they will schedule the procedure, they'll clean out my uterus, and then I'll have a more favorable growing zone for baby.  However, everything I've now read online has me worried.  Ugh - Jennine!  STAY OFF THE INTERNET!
Hoping Dr. Wagener can clear things up easily.  Just another set-back in our journey.  I'm pretty sad about it all.
BUT - today I'm off to my 8th grade class reunion, so that will be fun, and hoping this week I can make some time to digest what has happened to us.  Just prolonging our dreams yet again.  Stupid uterus. 
Adhesion and Polyp, go away, don't come back another day...
I'll write more later when I have some time.

Blogger's remorse...

As more and more people learn about our IVF plans, I'm expanding my blog-following.  However, as I tell each person, "You should read my blog..."  I get little butterflies in the pit of my stomach when I think:  "Did I type anything too personal in the blog?  Will that person be offended when they read about my relations with Rob at such an early age, my bout with alcohol overuse, or my use of the pill previously in life?  Was that person mentioned in my blog?  What was said about them?  Will people understand my sense of humor?"  Diagnosis:  I have been suffering from Blogger's Remorse.
After running all of that (and then some) through my brain, it reminds me of how much of a worrier I am.  Always so concerned with how others view me and my life.  I sure hope I don't pass that along to my child.  May they inherit Rob's carefree outlook on life instead!  :)  However, anyone who reads the blog is someone who loves and cares about Rob and I both, and they know enough about us to know that we are good people who have been dealt a bad hand in the baby-making department...and they know how we've dealt with it over the years has not been easy.  These people are sure to understand some of my light-hearted comments I've voiced in this blog.  :)

I have much to report tonight.  First of all, we went to my Aunt's 80th birthday party this past Sunday.  It was a nice get-together with family that we don't see all too often.  Rob says, "I can't believe I've been part of your family for nearly 20 years and I've only met these people a few times."  I admit, it was a little akward at first.  I think my mom had visions of me chatting it up with long lost cousins, and while we were there she certainly did her best to get me to play yard games with everyone, which I steadfastly resisted.  I guess in a crowd where I'm not too comfortable I prefer to blend in on the sidelines.  I spent far too many years trying to be the center of attention when I was drinking.  :)  Throughout the day I got to have brief conversations with each family member, even if it was just a "Hi," or "Hello," it was a very pleasant visit.  By far the highlight of the day was getting to talk to my cousin, Nicole (who now reads this blog too!)  My cousin and her husband went through IVF and are now the proud parents of beautiful 15 month old twins, a boy and a girl.  When I went to her baby shower, I remember my mom prodding me to talk to Nic about IVF and I fought back "No mom.  We're just not having kids."  That was still during the time when I thought I would pay a fortune for IVF only to miscarry once again...before I found renewed faith in the HOPE IVF program, which we still are praying we qualify for.  Anyway, Rob and I had a great chat with Nicole who seemed excited for us and was very reassuring...especially about the injection part of things.  :)Her twins are complete little miracles who stole the whole show on Sunday!  :)

Today I scheduled my sonohysterogram appointment.  I found a link to a website that may help explain the procedure to those of you who might be curious.   The simplest explanation is that it is a test to make sure my uterus doesn't have any abnormalities that would make pregnancy difficult.  http://www.ivf1.com/sonohysterogram/

My sonohysterogram appointment will be this Thursday, the 12th, at 7am.  So exciting to get another part of the process underway.  My sister and nephews are in town for a visit that day, but I will just have to make it work around the appointment.  They are squeezing me in for this appointment before my doctor starts his vacation.

So it's starting to get exciting.  One step at a time, one day at a time, one blog at a time.  :)

Gaze into my imaginery crystal ball...

What better way to celebrate the 4th of July than by eating at a Chinese Buffet?  We had been dying to try Big Shanghai Buffet for quite sometime, and I was especially excited to go because I was hoping to get some "good fortune."  The top one was my fortune and the bottom one was Rob's. 

I suppose any fortune could maybe be twisted and turned in order to seem to be related to our pregnancy plans, but these seem like they make a decent amount of sense!

Having a baby will be a change for the better, and we will find a solution to actually having a baby by trying IVF...something we hadn't ever envisioned ourselves trying in the past!

And since we're on the topic of good fortune, I thought I'd give the old Horoscope app a whirl again today.  Here's what we have:

"Hope for the best but plan for the worst.  That's a typical trait of most Aries people.  Sometimes, you don't even bother to hope for the best - you just plan for the worst.  That way, if the best happens it's a nice surprise.  Right now you may be working in the latter mode.  You are afraid to hope and dream.  You just want to be prepared in case disaster strikes.  But disaster will not strike, unless you call it up and invite it to come over.  Allow yourself to hope and to dream, and to believe that the best will be - and it will be."

OK.  :)

Let it rain

Not much to blog about since I am PATIENTLY taking my birth control everyday and just waiting for the next step in our process, which I anticipate as being weeks away.  I'm OK with that. We have some things coming up in the next few weeks that I'd rather focus on.  Setting my cell phone alarm to remind me to take my pill has worked wonders by the way!
As I'm typing right now it continues to thunder outside.  It's been so gol darn hot the past few days.  Today the air conditioning went out at work, talk about heat wave!  I hate being cold, and I am always freezing at work, so you'd think I'd welcome the warmer air, but it just felt like a hot, sticky, sweaty, sauna... being caged up in there with all the other roasting office folk!  I did catch myself everytime I thought to complain though, and thought about our drivers, mechanics and dock personnel who deal with much worse on a daily basis. 
The thunder always peaks my interest.  It's a neat sound, although sometimes scary.  My dogs and cats are usually afraid of it so I try to keep them calm.  As long as the sirens aren't going off, it intrigues me.  The thunder and lighting, if they produce any rain, will most likely twart my plans for getting anymore of our landscaping project done tonight, which will relieve my exhausted husband I'm sure.
The thunder calls to mind a quote I like..."Life isn't about surviving the storm, it's about learning to dance in the rain."  Very poetic when you relate it to our infertility journey.   :)